sometimes i feel like im bothering everyone or disappointing them and i want to curl up and go to sleep and cry a lil bit because its overwhelming

i think about dying a lot to and if people would care in a few years or if theyd continue on like normal. 

it also hurts because sometimes when i i say i think people hate me people seem to get annoyed and say :nono everyone loves you" and they think im fishing for compliments but im not. i think everyone truly hates me.

that happened once i was friends with someone who secretly hated me and when they came out and said they hated me it crushed my heart so now i think everyone feels the same way